|
| i'll fall apart... by myself... no one there to talk or understand.. feel sustained, dry my eyes... etc etc
hmmm... hi, my new name is torn.
| | |
| Hey again. Yeah. I've been like, kinda really depressed lately. I dont
really know what to say. Seeing couples. Or just seeing John with
someone that isn't me. Or just seeing John. (or thinking about him).
I think I've become obsessed. I think its in my best intrest that he come over to my house and give me a hug.
but that's not going to happen.
| | |
| i guess when i quoted the "you'll never see me after friday" thing john said, i didn't notice its impact.
we broke up again.
on saturday.
yeah.. too bad it didn't work out. and i miss him like hell. and he
gets mad at me when i tell him that, or when i talk to him, or when i
talk to guys. so basically all i can do is sit and suck my thumb. and
then he gets mad at me for not talking to him... or something?
| | |
| BTW: of course me and johnny boy are going back out. Woot Woot!!! lol i was so happy.
Today for some reason my tummy started hurting after school. and my
contacts are fucked up! I have to find the contact solution so that I
can actually take this shits out at night.
John couldn't pick me up from work. :( he had baseball. (and it starts)
lol The whole "I'll never see you after friday because of baseball".
Yesterday I was so happy. He rubbed my shoulders cuz they were killing
me (kinda like they are now) and I was laying down on the couch, cuz I
was tired, and he layed down next to me. And it was so warm and comfy
and I coulda falled asleep right there. Yumm. Those are the best times.
| | |
| Agh. Im so confused. John sent me text messages and it was understood
that we weren't going to talk anymore. Then soo says he misses me and
we're such a weird couple and stuff. I say "if you get him to talk to
me without being cinical or mean or sarcastic then i'll talk to him".
Not two seconds after I send that he im's me and says hi. We started
talking and I told soo her magical powers work quickly. He said "if you
want to try and fix this i'll say yes" but I'm not sure how much he
wants to fix this. Cuz we were screwed beyond belief as of yesterday.
And I really wanna try this again, but everythings so complicated. And
basically I have untill 12:30 to think about it and make a decison, or
else it would be considered procrastinating. Which I would be. I really
do love him.
Soo said that's all that matters. It's not that easy after last night.
| | |
|
